MARYLAND
Saturday, November 18, 2023
A coworker gave me a magic mushroom and I ate it for breakfast, washed down with cinnamon-flavored coffee. #3 Michigan is on the road in the Terrapin State sans Harbaugh as the university, in a sudden reversal of strategy, accepted the Big Ten’s three-game suspension of their football coach on Thursday. The decision baffled me. The college football pregame shows speculated that the acceptance of punishment felt like an admission of guilt, on some level; perhaps it was, or perhaps Harbaugh did not want to draw attention away from the team. Either way, accepting the suspension meant Harbaugh would be out for the Ohio State game as well. Offensive coordinator Sherrone Moore, who proved himself a capable replacement in Happy Valley, led the team onto the field at SECU Stadium in College Park, serving as the acting head coach for the second consecutive week and the third time this season.
Wearing the all-white road uniform and sporting heavy, smeared eye black to combat the mid-Atlantic sun, JJ McCarthy led the offense onto the field first after Michigan received the opening kickoff, but the drive sputtered to a three and out. McCarthy’s counterpart, senior Taulia Tagavailoa, led the 6-4 Terrapins onto the field following a Tommy Doman punt. A four-year starter for Maryland, he went 5 for 5 to open the game, leading his team on a 57-yard drive that ultimately stalled at the Michigan 17-yard line. Sophomore place kicker Jack Howes nailed a 35-yard field goal attempt from there, giving Maryland an early 3-0 advantage to the delight of the home crowd.
After that, Michigan dominated for a long stretch of the first half. JJ showed signs of life on our second possession, kick-starting the drive with a 23-yard completion to favorite-receiver Roman Wilson. Blake the Great took over from there. Over the next eight snaps, Corum rushed six times for a total of 39 yards, capping the drive with a 2-yard touchdown smash up the middle, a Blake specialty. The score gave Corum 19 rushing touchdowns on the season, putting him one away from tying Hassan Haskin’s school-record of 20 in a single season and five away from tying the A-Train’s school record of 55 career rushing touchdowns.
Including Corum’s touchdown, which made it 7-3 Wolverines, Michigan scored 23 unanswered points, giving the impression they were running away with the game. Tommy Doman booted the ball into the yellow, black, and red checkerboard-pattern endzone for a touchback, giving Maryland the ball at the 25-yard line to start their second drive. Tagavailoa threw his first incompletion of the game on the ensuing first down, then his second on the next play when he aired it out deep down field, missing his receiver by inches. On 3rd down, Tagavailoa once again dropped back to pass, but Michigan brought pressure from both edges – Derrick Moore from the left and CJ Stokes from the right – forcing the Terps quarterback to backpedal. When he had retreated to his own 10-yard line, Stokes knocked the ball loose, allowing Moore to scoop it up at the 4-yard line and carry it in for a Michigan touchdown, their second in only 19 seconds. Gus Johnson, calling the game for FOX, hyped the Cardi Boys – his nickname for Michigan’s defense – as they donned sunglasses and posed for a picture on the sideline. Momentum had flipped in a big way.
The Cardi Boys struck again on the next drive. After Maryland rushed for 2 yards on their first play of the drive, Jaylen Harrel sacked Tagavailoa for a loss of 9 on the next, forcing a third and long. Kris Jenkins and Braiden McGregor brought more pressure on third down, chasing Tagavailoa into his own end zone before the Terps quarterback threw it away to the sidelines. Christian Boivin, a Junior walk-on from Traverse City West, blocked the ensuing punt into the endzone, forcing the Maryland punter to kick the loose ball out of the back of the endzone for a safety. With only 32 seconds left in the first quarter, the Wolverines led 16-3.
Another Corum touchdown halfway through the second quarter capped a 15-play, 64-yard drive that chewed up seven and a half minutes of clock. This one put Michigan ahead 23-3 and made it look like the route was on, but then my magic mushroom kicked in, and from that point on, Michigan seemed intent on making it a bad trip. Seemingly down and out, Tagavailoa demonstrated his mettle on the next possession, completing 8 of 9 passes on a 14-play drive that went 75 yards. Michigan almost prevented a touchdown with a goal line stand, forcing a 4th and goal from the 1-yard line, but the Terps brought out a secret weapon in backup QB Billy Edwards Jr., a 6’4, 205-pound transfer from Wake Forest who apparently specialized in short yard rushes a la Jaylen Hurts’ Tush Push. It worked. Edwards’ touchdown run cut the lead to 23-10 with two minutes left until halftime.
At this point I reflected that Maryland was still in the game despite all that had gone wrong for them; that was a bad sign in a football game. Without Michigan’s defensive scores, after all, Michigan’s lead would have only been 14-10. JJ McCarthy, rumored to be dealing with an injury, looked noticeably off; this was evident on the next drive when he led the offense in a two-minute drill. He efficiently marched the offense to the redzone, setting up a first and goal from the 7-yard line with 42 seconds left. At worst, it seemed, Michigan would close the half with a field goal. Instead, McCarthy threw a bad interception in the endzone, one made worse by the fact that the previous play should have resulted in an interception, too. Compounding the bad taste left in the mouth was that Maryland got the ball to start the second half. The mushroom I ate before the game felt like a bad decision, going into the break, with my anxiety spinning its wheels.
The shroom trip only got worse in the second half as the anxiety morphed into panic. Tagavailoa appeared to have turned a corner in the game. He put his talent on display on the second play of the second half when he threw a beautiful spiral that dropped right into the hands of Kaden Prather for a 34-yard gain, a completion that felt significant in that it extended the momentum Maryland had generated before halftime into the second half. A roughing the passer call against Mason Graham on a third and five further extended that momentum, setting the Turtles up with a 1st and 10 from the Michigan 21. On the next play, Tagavailoa completed a 13-yard pass to Tai Felton for another first down, this one a 1st and goal. He then showed off his running ability, scrambling 7 yards before being brought down just shy of the endzone. Michigan’s rush defense subsequently stuffed Maryland’s third down rushing attempt from a yard out, forcing a 4th and goal for the second time in the game. Again, Maryland turned to secret weapon Billy Edwards Jr., who again succeeded with the Tush Push play; perhaps cute the first time, it was now downright frustrating that Maryland’s backup quarterback had beaten us twice with the same play on a 4th and goal. “First points scored against Michigan in the third quarter all season,” Gus Johnson observed, “and Maryland is right back in this football game.” A troubling observation indeed, it prompted flashbacks to last year’s nailbiter against Illinois, which also transpired the week before our date with Ohio State. Unable to sit still, I went to put my laundry in the dryer, then moseyed outside for a cigarette.
Michigan’s offense looked really bad – they went three and out on their opening possession of the half – putting the pressure on the defense to carry us in the second half. Maryland’s second possession of the half, which started at their own 24-yard line, gave the home team the chance to take the lead with a touchdown. Instead, Michigan’s leader on defense answered the call to arms issued by Michigan fans everywhere. On a 2nd down and 9 from the 42, Mikey Sainristil jumped a route and picked off Tagavailoa for a huge stopgap in terms of momentum. It looked as if Sainristil might have kept his knees from touching the ground when an offensive player attempted to tackle him, after which Sainristil proceeded to take the ball to the house, but video review ruled him down at the 49-yard line.
Sainristil’s turnover gave Michigan good field position to work with and the offense capitalized. Despite an off-game – not at 100% health, JJ completed only 12 of 23 pass attempts for 141 yards in the game, with no touchdowns and one interception – McCarthy threw three big completions on the drive to three different receivers (Johnson, Morgan, and Loveland), the last a critical one to Colston Loveland on a 4th and 3 from the Maryland 24-yard line. Sherrone Moore then dialed up a trick play, giving the ball to speedster Semaj Morgan on a reverse. With a lanky frame and long strides reminiscent of Steve Breaston, Morgan dashed to the right sideline and, while collared by a defender, extended the ball to the orange pylon with his right hand. The sideline judge raised both arms to signal a touchdown, one that felt monumental. Michigan’s two-point conversion attempt, which perplexingly saw JJ throw a fade to Barner in the corner of the endzone, failed, resulting in a 29-17 score as the fourth quarter loomed.
Before the third quarter was over, however, Maryland answered with another convincing drive, one that started at their own 16-yard line. Carrying the Terrapins, Tagavailoa once again looked stellar, making several big throws, starting with a 13-yard completion to Jeshaun Jones on 3rd and 11 that kept the drive – and Maryland’s hopes – alive. Terps running back Roman Hemby gained 7 yards on back-to-back rushes for another first down, then Tagavailoa threw another dime to Jeshaun Jones, this one for a 24-yard gain that pushed Maryland into Michigan territory. On the next play, he threw an even better pass down the sideline, placing it perfectly by putting it just out of reach of cornerback Will Johnson – who rarely got beat – and right into the hands of Prather, who hauled it in before tumbling into the endzone. Initially ruled a touchdown, video review reversed the call as officials determined that Prather’s knee hit the ground just shy of the goal line. That set Maryland up with another 1st and goal from the 1-yard line, and wouldn’t you know it? In came Billy Edwards Jr. to execute the Tush Push for the third time in the game. Deja vu ensued: Edwards Jr. scored in the same fashion as the first two – each time gaining only a few inches in a massive scrum that obscured the exact location of the ball – prompting me to ask my empty apartment if we were going to let Billy fucking Edwards end our best shot at a national championship in twenty-five years. Probably, I concluded; it sounded like the kind of twisted cosmic joke that cursed Michigan Football, after all, the kind I had grown to expect over the previous decades.
Where was the boa constrictor – the one that sucked the life from Michigan’s opponents in the second half? Going into the game, Michigan’s D had yet to cede a point to its opponents in a third quarter, and now they had given up 21 to the Maryland fucking Terrapins. Destiny and fate felt like they were hanging in the balance as the fourth quarter started, with the undefeated Wolverines clinging to a precarious 5-point lead.
Championship teams found a way to win close games, to win despite their worst performances, and it was time to find out if Michigan was truly championship-caliber. The first play of the fourth quarter resulted in a first down completion to Semaj Morgan, but any feelings of an auspicious start to the quarter evaporated when Maryland sacked McCarthy two plays later for a loss of 7, forcing a 3rd and long at the 32. McCarthy connected with AJ Barner on third down, but the throw was far short of the sticks and the Maryland defense brought Barner down before he could carry the ball any further. It was a 7-yard completion when Michigan needed 14. As such, Tommy Doman trotted onto the field with the punting unit, then booted it into the endzone for a touchback. The punter was proving to be one of the unsung heroes of the game.
Following their uncharacteristic third quarter performance, Michigan’s defense redeemed themselves in the fourth. Maryland’s next possession went nowhere, with McGregor and Graham teaming up to sack Tagavailoa for a 10-yard loss on third and long to force a Maryland punt from inside their own 20. The punt went only 32 yards, giving Michigan the ball back at midfield, but Michigan’s offense failed to capitalize on the field position this time, going three and out in lackluster fashion. Doman, suddenly a weapon we needed, punted again, pinning Maryland at their own 10-yard line. With an opportunity to pounce, Michigan’s defense came up big again on the ensuing drive. Kenneth Grant stuffed a run on first down, then sacked Tagavailoa for a loss of 9 on 2nd down, forcing 3rd and 18 from the 2-yard line. Tagavailoa, trying to play the hero, launched a deep ball from his own endzone. It wasn’t a terrible throw, but Mikey Sainristil – rapidly ascending to Michigan legend status – leaped up and grabbed it before the receiver had a chance to, recording his second interception of the game.
Sainristil’s pick felt like the dagger, setting Michigan up at the Maryland 39-yard line with only five and a half minutes remaining, but Michigan’s offense proceeded to squander the opportunity. A holding penalty pushed them 10 yards back – likely out of field goal range – after which McCarthy threw back-to-back incompletions. Doman punted yet again, this time pinning Maryland at their own 1-yard line. Then Tagavailoa made another mistake from his own endzone when he attempted to throw the ball away with no receivers in the vicinity, a penalty that by rule resulted in a safety, Michigan’s second one of the game.
Even then, Michigan’s offense struggled to close the game. Leading 31-24 with two minutes remaining, they needed only a first down, maybe two, to close it out, but three straight rushes netted nine yards total, forcing a 4th and 1. Sherrone Moore channeled Jim Harbaugh and went for it, giving the ball to Corum, who fought and clawed towards the line to gain. Refs brought out the chains for measurement, which showed Corum had gained it by inches. That more or less capped it. It was an ugly ending to an ugly game, but Michigan escaped College Park with their dreams intact, still undefeated. The win gave the program 1,000 all-time wins, making them the first team to reach that milestone, but that hardly mattered. A date with the 11-0 Buckeyes at Michigan Stadium loomed, a date some were already calling the most important matchup in the history of the rivalry, one in which everything was on the line.
Thanksgiving was only a few days away, and I had a flight to Detroit booked for Thanksgiving Day. Still, everyone back home knew that’s not what I was really flying back to Michigan for. I was going back to Michigan for The Game.